Dating is complicated. Relationships are awkward, especially in the beginning stages. There are so many “rules” that we have in our heads when it comes to dating. The guy always has to pay, the guy always has to drive, every date has to be extravagant and special, etc. I hate them all. As much as I love to be surprised with romantics, it’s totally not fair to pin everything on the guy! Dating can be so strange, especially when the check comes at the end of dinner. But, as I’ve learned, there doesn’t need to be tension. Not everything needs to be perfect. Relationships can be chill.
I think that dates should be paid for equally between both people. Letting someone treat you every once in a while is a great surprise and very kind. However, females are quite capable of paying for our own food, our own entertainment, and everything else that a couple does together. If I were a guy, I’d be instantly turned off if the lady I was seeing expected me to pay for everything.
Grant and I work the same amount of hours. We are paid the same amount of money. It wouldn’t be fair for me to expect him to pay for everything that we do. We do everything together. I’d be rich and he’d be in debt. As a couple, especially at this point in our relationship, it’s important to be a team. We pay bills together. We pay for dinner together. We pay for our trips and activities together. We both work hard and deserve to buy our own things with our money that we have earned. It’s a rewarding feeling to be able to afford and buy things that you want.
Deciding to go out and do something is usually a mutual idea. A lot of times it’s with friends, too. If I go out with Grant and our friends, there’s no way that I’d expect Grant pay for me. If we’re out as a group and it’s not a date, it’s completely ridiculous for him to pay for me. Now if it’s a date that he had planned, Grant would pay for me. Aside from that, we’re equal. We both pull our own weight. Girls need to be ok with pulling their own weight in the dating game. Even better, the girl should pick up the tab every once in a while. Relationships are about loving each other, not financially supporting each other. It only works if you’re a team.
It’s pretty common for people to still assume that the guy has to pay for everything. I truly feel bad for men. It’s not cool to judge guys for not getting the bill. It’s not cool to judge a couple for paying separately. In fact, it’s perfectly normal to pay separately. It’s better if you do. Being a team in a relationship is the only way to keep it fair and to keep some independence.
Don’t be that girl who expects the guy to pick up the bill every time you go out. Don’t be the guy who feels like you have to constantly pay for the girl. Take turns picking up the bill. Get him a pizza, and he’ll get you ice cream. It’s simple and nobody owes anybody anything. It’s 2017 people. Be independent and be chill in the dating game.